The Introverted Spouse + New Duty Station

We've got another great post today by our ambassador, Kelsey! Our July box is all about finding and embracing community as a family, and this is the perfect read for our summer PCS season: or to save to reread when your moving day comes. She writes from experience on how to make your transition to your new community a little bit easier. Thanks, Kelsey! Read more from Kelsey at

For any introvert, the idea of trying to walk into a room and make new friends is well, overwhelming.  Toss in the constant moving experienced by military spouses and the task seems almost impossible.

Social anxieties can make a PCS and new duty station even more challenging. 

But, it doesn’t have to be that difficult. 

In fact, as a milspouse, finding new friends is so important yet why do we over-complicate things?

Here are some simple things for an introvert to do to make finding friends a painless and enjoyable process.

First things first, make a goal.

Make finding friends a goal of yours and put it at the top of your to-do list. Ya know, the same way you make it a goal to unpack boxes before your spouse returns home or finish that episode of your favorite show.

Use your interests to find new friends.

If you like books, join a book club. If you love sports and fitness, find an adult league or local fitness group.  By finding groups that do things you already love, you’ll make the experience ten times smoother and enjoy yourself in the process!

If you have kids, use them!

Go to playgroups, mommy groups, the park.  The possibilities are really endless and many bases have options geared towards children of all ages.  

Above all, be yourself.

If we stop trying too hard and just focus on who we are, maybe friendships wouldn’t be so hard.  Be yourself and the rest will fall into place.

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